Iktsuarpok: The Anticipation When You’re Waiting for Someone To Arrive - Inuit
On one of the weird states of humanity, and the psychology of waiting
In an ordinary home, a familiar situation from the library of humanity's weird phases happens...
A young woman wearing a half-sexy, half-careful dress stands behind the door and whispers with a cattish scream:
"God! Where the hell has he been?"
She can’t stand still for even a moment; her heart is busy fighting anxiety and fear. In less than two minutes, all of a sudden, she rushes to the mirror in the bedroom:
"Do I look alright? I think it would look better if I wore my hair up, but I look fine with it down."
Having decided to let her hair loose, with the possibility that allowing her date pal to touch her hair would result in more romantic moments, she reaches a short second of calmness. However, barely three minutes later, another anxious branch blows its wind:
"He'll be here in a few minutes; I should clean up a little. I don't want to create the appearance that I'm disorganized. Well, he doesn't need to discover my wonderful qualities on the first date!"
The other dread from the queue occurs after she spends roughly five minutes sweating and stuffing everything into the cupboards:
"He's almost five minutes late. Is he constantly late? I'm typically late as well. But, no, I hate being kept waiting, and I hope he doesn't do it all the time. Oh, anyway, even if he does, he's attractive enough to make me forget that."
This continues until the expected visitor appears in front of the door with a gentle knock.
While waiting for someone to arrive, the mind jumps from worry to worry, thought to thought, assumption to assumption, and judgment to judgment, much like a monkey jumping from branch to branch. Anticipating someone's coming can sometimes be so stressful that one runs out of air.
A person who worries about things that have not yet happened, who anticipates bad things that might happen, who even sweats and stiffens with fear, looks pathetic and a little funny from the outside. If asked what would be the opposite of being in the moment—which is what most Eastern philosophies advise us to do—I think it would be a perfect example to describe it.
In the Inuit language, this circumstance is referred to as: Iktsuarpok
Iktsuarpok means frequently checking the door and stressing while you wait for someone to arrive to your house.
This must be something that the Inuit face frequently. It is not weird to conclude that they are a society that does not live in the present and is overly concerned. Of course, drawing conclusions about a civilization from a single word is unrealistic, but isn't that part of the point of these posts? Thinking about concepts and learning about a civilization by thinking and writing about a word.
I actually experienced this situation recently. A person we had been going to work with for a long time was coming to our house to meet, and I was naturally very excited. What kind of person is he? Will we get along? Tons of questions accumulated in my head. I wish I had known this word then. I could have labeled what I was going through better.
Iktsuarpok is one of the infinite number of emotional states, and luckily we have a society that has given it a name. I think we owe it to them.
Notes & Reads:
When I thought about "the state of waiting and expecting," two novels appeared in my mind. Those are not about a wait of a few minutes or hours. They are the waiting state of years—a life.
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald is a classic of American literature, and as well as many other things, the long and painfully hopeful wait of Gatsby for his sweet Daisy can never be forgotten.
The French Lieutenant's Woman by John Fowles is another novel that makes me think about a man in pursuit of a possible happy ending with a mysterious woman. Of course limiting the novel in such a dimension is obviously unfair, so I should remind that the waiting state of the man (Charles Smithson) which is an impression I now remember is only a part of the plot.
Have a great week and weekend.
Till next week,
— Gulsun
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Firstly, I didn't know who Inuits were. Thanks to Google search, I am aware now. An unpronounceable word for a familiar feeling :)
Interestingly you gave two classic book recommendations of men waiting for their eternal love. I have yet to read Fowles, therefore another name added to the neverending list.
Of women in waiting, there are many; however, the historic Penelope in the Odyssey comes to mind promptly. The modern retelling by Margaret Atwood called "The Penelopiad" is a gem worth exploring(or revisiting), for themes beyond waiting.
Cheers :)